Stress..

In todays world, the organization you work for plays a much larger role than you think. It unconsciously becomes the tribe you belong to, your social stomping ground, extended family etc. In fact, I once envisioned a world without countries..just different fortune 500 companies warring or collaborating with each other. You would have used your identity card to enter your company, and signed the guest register to enter another company. No more passports and visas...

But after working for a corporation for the last 2 years, I realize that maybe thats a pipe dream. The stress levels in my life are all but killing me, and when I look around for a moment at friends and colleagues I see the same is true for them. So then it would seem that corporations, far from being benign harnessers of peoples productivity, are actually burning us all out in an effort to squeeze the maximum from each resource.

Granted, a fat paycheck may compensate for the stress, aggravation and loss of social life outside work, but in the end, 20 years pass and you realize you achieved nothing. Like hamsters on the corporate ferris wheel. We run and run and they give us the pellets to make us run some more...

All this came to mind because I was watching a documentary on eminent industrialist JRD Tata yesterday. He spent most of his life driving fast cars, piloting aeroplanes, travelling, making charitable gestures, but he is still remembered as one of the brightest individuals our country has produced. So how is it that he could spend his life doing exactly what he wanted, and yet rise to such great heights? How come he never got burned out or stressed out but always had a look of such peace on his face?

The answer probably lies in the fact that he lived in a different age. When you could do these things. When there was some time to breathe. But I also think it has to do with a steadfast determination on his part to make time to do the things that excited him and not get swayed from this.

So beginning now, I am going to get out of work at 7pm, go meet my friends, read books and join a gym. Thats my new resolution in honour of JRD.

I have been reduced to plagiarism (yet another word you should know)

MSN Encarta - 10 Words You Simply Must Know: "1. Defenestrate: 'throw somebody or something out of window: to throw something or somebody out of a window (formal or humorous)'

It is quite entertaining to defenestrate paper airplanes.

2. Garbology: 'study of waste materials: the study of a cultural group by an examination of what it discards'

Garbology might be a good career choice for dumpster divers. Recycling may make the job of future garbologists extremely difficult--they'll have less to study.

3. Digerati: 'computer experts: people who have or claim to have a sophisticated expertise in the area of computers, the Internet, and the World Wide Web'

Not too long ago, computer expertise was considered nerdy. These days, many people strive to be among the digerati.

4. Antipodes:
1. 'places at opposite sides of world: places at opposite sides of the world from each other, or the areas at the side of the world opposite from a given place'
2. 'opposites: two points, places, or things that are diametrically opposite each other'

One could say that Arthur 'Fonzie' Fonzarelli and Warren 'Potsie' Weber are antipodes.

5. Hallux: 'first digit on the foot: the big toe on the human foot, or the first digit on the hind foot of some mammals, birds, reptiles, and amphibians (technical)'

The ballerina had her hallux insured for $10 million!

6. Otiose:
1. 'not effective: with no useful result or practical purpose'
2. 'worthless: with little or no value'
3. 'lazy: unwilling or uninterested in working or being active (archaic)'

Will e-mail render traditional letter writing otiose? Let's hope "

7. Cullet: "glass to be recycled: broken or waste glass returned for recycling"

Don't forget to take the cullet out to the curbside, and be sure to put it next to the trash, not in it.

8. Pellucid:
1. "clear in meaning: easy to understand or clear in meaning (formal)"
2. "transparent: allowing all or most light to pass through (literary)"

The police officer's warning was pellucid: drivers must go the speed limit in the school zone.

9. Borborygmus: "stomach rumble: the rumbling sounds made by the movement of gases in the stomach and intestine (technical)"

If you lay your head on someone's stomach, you are likely to hear borborygmus.

10. Embrangle: "perplex somebody: to confuse, perplex, or entangle somebody or something (archaic)"

As Lord Needlebottom attempted to explain the rules of cricket, his American friends became more and more embrangled.

S&M M&A

MSNBC - Bigger breasts offered as perk to U.S. soldiers

Heh..bigger boobs to distract the insurgents eh? I can just imagine the scenario...

Rebel jumps out of hiding place to shoot soldier. Soldier flashes boobs. Rebel is temporarily blinded and stunned and the soldier shoots him or better yet..takes him to prison for some S&M and bondage play (hey..thats everyman's fantasy no? Bondage with a big breasted woman in army uniform).

God dammit! This is all part of a bigger plan to combine the two biggest businesses in the world - the porn business and the military!!

YET AGAIN reporter Fido has come up with a brilliant and exclusive expose. Some sample titles..."Sgt Bubbs tough love" or "Prison Sex Kittens featuring Gen. Boozaloom".

Remember... you heard it first out here!

Generation Gap

Sometimes the generation gap hits you really hard. Like the other day Nidhi was complaining about her cable being out and not being able to watch anything on TV. So I told her..well, theres always Doordarshan which is the state run channel thats free to air and doesnt go over cable and you can get it if you have an antenna on your tv. So she was trying to get a handle on these astounding facts:

1. There are strange people out there who broadcast WITHOUT a satellite
2. You can get these channels without paying ANYTHING.
3. There is this thingy called an ANTENNA which sits on top of your TV (or in my family's case it used to sit on the top of our building and my dad would go up there and fiddle with it and yell "can you see just one image now? How about now? Now? Oh bugger it!!")

Aah..the good old days when we only had Doordarshan. They were like this:

You only got one channel, and they put stuff that would only make farmers happy, and their newsreaders never cracked a smile and were seldom younger than 50 years of age. And the image was all double and grainy. And they grudgingly played songs and you could never watch an entire tennis match cos they would just cut the match whenever it was time for news. And they had some good programs all family oriented where the heroine was a housewife who saved her neighborhood. Or there was this other program where this ugly dude came down from the US looking for a wife - except he dressed just like us and spoke like us and even had a bad haircut. Not very convincing. But hey, my sister watched this stuff so much she had spectacles thicker than the bottom of a drinking water glass by the time she was 6 years old.

My personality type

You are a WECF--Wacky Emotional Constructive Follower. This makes you a candle burning at both ends. You work until you drop, and you play until you can stand to work again. You have so much enthusiasm that you can find it hard to control on your own, and you appreciate the guidance that channels your energy and lets you be your best.

In a relationship, you require lots of attention and support. You often over-contribute and end up feeling depleted and cheated. You may benefit from more time alone than you grant yourself.

Your driving force is the emotional support of others--especially affection. You can run on empty for miles if you have positive energy behind you. Without it--as it occasionally must run dry--you are depressive, listless, and difficult to motivate.

You need a lot of affection. Get it any way you can, but never at the cost of your self-respect or well-being.

Take the test here

New Age!

Ive started to notice a disturbing trend in this world. First of all, there isnt a day when someone doesnt send me a forward informing me how I should be nice to my friends, tell them I love them, or that life is a lesson and you have to learn from this life or that we are all meant to fulfill our destinies or we have to liberate ourselves and show the glory of God.

WELL U KNOW WHAT?
FUCK THAT SHIT!

Its like when you went to your mom when you were small and said Mommy I scraped my knee and she gave u a bandaid and it felt better a bit. But what if u went to her and said Mom, I cut off my frigging leg and she said here beta, take a bandaid?

All these new age crappy aphorisms are like small bandaids on the big wounds of life. For fucks sakes, I dont need a bandaid woman! I need a doctor!

I guess Im just ranting in a homicidal manner because the other day, I was discussing some problem in life with my mom, and u know what she said? She said...beta, everything in life is a lesson and u have to use these opportunities to learn. I almost strangled her...Instead, I calmly informed her that everyone has heard that one. Then I opened the car door and rolled out into the middle of traffic. Believe me. That was more useful and enjoyable.

Best friends

Last night was v. interesting. Took a family friend visiting from Bangalore (female, 25) to dinner with my best buddies. Within moments, it was like a pack of sharks descending on the poor woman. They literally tore her to bits with all sorts of

Questions (if ur Feedos' family friend, whats his Mom's name? Ok. Whats his Dad's name. Ok. Whats his dogs name?)

Comments (Be sure to lock ur room door at night. If theres any trouble, escape through the balcony)

And lewd innuendos (so, you come from Bang galore eh? Did Feedo REALLY tie u up when u were children? Wink wink).

She was, to phrase US military terminology, "shocked and awed". She fled after dinner for a soothing coffee with some other friends.

I dont know if Im alone in this or what. Do your best friends tend to be the maddest, craziest people who absolutely have no regard for your feelings and who enjoy putting you in embarrassing situations while at the same time you know you can count on them for absolutely anything?

Simplified Happiness

So the last entry was too long. Have simplified it now. The secret of happiness is:

1. Your parents 50%
2. Your crappy life 10%
3. What you tell yourself (you naughty little person) 40%

So there.

Happiness

According to Dresdner Kleinwort Wasserstein Research:

"The largest contributor to happiness is the genetically determined set point (or more accurately set range). That is to say, people are pre-disposed to a certain level of happiness, which is determined by characteristics inherited from their parents! As Sheldon et al note “ The set point likely reflects immutable interpersonal, temperamental and affective personality traits, such as extraversion, arousability and negative affectivity, that are rooted in neurobiology, ...are highly heritable... and change little over the lifespan.”"

So the amount of happiness in our lives was already determined from the day we were born?!! Jeez. Well, thats nice...At least I have my parents to blame eh? That makes me feel a little happier...

And furthermore...

"The second component of happiness is circumstances. Life circumstances include demographic factors, age, gender, ethnicity and geographic factors. It also includes personal history and life status. Frequently people focus upon the last element of this feature.

However, study after study from psychology shows that money doesn’t equal happiness.

There is an additional problem with changing life circumstances as a path to increasing happiness. It goes by the frightening name of hedonic adaptation. Simply put, hedonic adaptation means we are very good at quickly assimilating our current position, and
then judging it as normal, hence only changes from our “normal” level get noticed."

Rankings and ratings of happiness factors

Item
Family Life Mean rank 1.7 Mean points 37
Friends Mean rank 2.4 Mean points 22
Satisfying job Mean rank 2.5 Mean points 26
High income Mean rank 3.6 Mean points 15
Source: Loewenstein

Hmmm..faschinating Mish Moneypenny. So does this mean that even earning more money or increasing status in society will leave us as miserable as before? You betcha. But why do we do it then? Somebody out there has the answer..give it to meeee!!

And now we come to the conclusion of the study:

"All of which means that any hope for increasing happiness on a long term basis must lie with the third and final component of happiness – intentional activity. Sheldon et al define intentional activity as “discrete actions or practices that people can choose to do”. By process of elimination, intentional activity must account for 40% of people’s happiness.

Intentional activity can be (somewhat artificially) broken down into three areas:
Behavioural activities – such as exercising regularly, having sex, being kind to others, and spending time socialising.
Cognitive activities – such as trying to see the best, pausing to count how lucky one actually is.
Volitional activities – striving for personal goals, devoting effort to meaningful causes. "

So ones lifes happiness is thus: 50% genetic, 10% circumstance, and 40% intentional!

Please note that having sex and exercising are amongst the most powerful ways to increase happiness.

Well...what are we waiting for?!!